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Francine Caitlyn Chye
a.k.a. Hurricaine Fran
a.k.a. Fran the PCD
a.k.a. the happy bunny :D
<3
040889 (August baby!)
Crescent, ACJC, hocker
xoxo
If it's meant to be, it'll be(:
"And sometimes good things fall apart
so better things can fall together"
don't think, just run
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
I feel like i've been hit by a truck.
So much has been going through my mind for quite a long while now and nothing seems to be getting any easier. I guess what the 'world' perceives may be getting the better of me, especially since i'm still trembling in fear. We were never part of that aspect of the 'world', i know, and although that much is certain, it's still troubling all the same. What's frightening is the whole idea of not being about to go back. What's done is done and when impulses strike and the doing seems to be the most tempting of sorts, the emptiness that's left from wanting has no choice but to attempt to make up for the sinfulness of it all. History is bunk, history is bunk but we all know it's not. Use it to grow, what's done is done. So why does it still haunt me?
The battles between head and heart, heart and heart and i'm left so empty and confused. I wish it was so much easier to decide. I wish it wasn't so complicated. Yes i agree, i wish we were the type of people to not give a care in the world about the happenings surrounding, to the feelings and emotions of everyone else and putting our own secondary. I'm sick of worrying. I wish fun didn't come with a price tag.
I think i'm just tired.
230am on monday and 345am last night. I'm completely buggered. I know that my surprising attentiveness during all classes (minus one slide during phy geog) was purely the adrenaline rush and tomorrow, oh tomorrow, tomorrow i'm going to feel it so badly. Physical tomorrow, too. I feel like i've been doing nothing but eating this past week. Luckily i'm over my utter complete laziness of the weekend and starting to get back into it. Thanks RuiYan for staying back to mug today so i had incentive to stay too. Roarrr.
Looking through my planner it's gonna be one hellava couple of weeks. August is always a busy month! Haha, august babies we're gonna be turning 17!!! Exciting, exciting, exciting. I love birthdays hahaha.. It's the only day you get to irritate people by continuously asking them what day it is and why it's special and how old you are (((: Yes i think the nonuts are sick of it by now. It's so sad though :( I miss our funky no nut bday celebrations! Sighs. The kinda thing we all wish we held on more tightly when we had it. The years pass by too quickly, it seems.
I'd do anything for a smile.
I don't think i can. It's a feeling thing and if i could, i'd alter my feelings just to fit yours. I know wanting to help and cure and heal and take away.. I know they're bad reasons, but it's all i want to do. And maybe i should take a step back and take a breather cos i don't know if it's going in the right direction for me.
Haha, eyecandy (: Haha. It's funny how attraction works.
There might never be another you,
and as bad as you are for me,
you're the only one that makes me blush like that
i miss it,
and you, but in totally different ways.
Trust should be given out carefully.
Very, very carefully.
Hmm i love lit. I love feminist books. I love learning about how it works. I don't think i've enjoyed any subject so much.
Apphia's last day on friday :( Guess i didn't realise til now that i love AH and everyone that's a part of it makes it that much more special. It's funny how life springs lessons on you like that, to treasure before it's all gone. Life's too short.
I just feel like typing tonight.
Hockey's been very good though, i really enjoyed pitch on tues. Getting to know the team better now and it's all very nice. Sometimes it's tiring in ways not so physical but i know it'll be worth it all the same. I hope physical doesn't kill me tomorrow. But then again, i kinda feel like giving it all away - it's sort of theraputic, this whole 'dying' thing.
-Mind over body.
ex-oh, ex-oh
11:42 PM
